When the Light Goes Out Before the First Breath

LIght of LifeToday’s post is not necessarily part of what I learned in heaven – though part of it is. Today’s post is a little bitter sweet. Quite often, our days have both a combination of bitter and of sweet. What I share today comes on the heels of the news received last week that the fourth baby we were expecting to add to our family this year will not be arriving. That news was received just ahead of the birth of this year’s baby #1. I know if I talked to a scientist he/she would give me some detailed explanation of exactly how and of what a heart is constructed of. Though my spiritual heart resides right next to my physical heart – they are definitely two interrelated yet separate operations. Somehow, my physical heart just keeps on beating while my spiritual heart wants to both shout with joy and crumble with grief. Our tally now comes to 15 sweet mortal angels (called grandchildren) and 5 heavenly angels that came and whispered their arrivals but who left before they took their first mortal breath. Those five heavenly angels have not disappeared – they are very real; they just did not need the same mortal experience that we did. For them, the perspective is much different. They love us and care for us and from their time perspective (which is different than ours), they know in no time at all we will be joining them. In the meantime, we mourn those angels we will have to wait to hold and we celebrate those angels who remain in our presence. It is at times like these that I hold on tightly to those amazing things that I learned in heaven. I hold onto the knowledge that my Father in Heaven is perfect and only wants what is best for me and those I love – even when we don’t understand why some things need to be the way they are. I will hold dear my knowledge of just how much we are loved by the Father of our souls. I will trust in that plan for my life that was prepared well before my first breath and I will know that I don’t have to understand everything – I just have to have faith and rely on that perfect, loving Being that I call my Father in Heaven.

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