Having a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? …Happy Mother’s Day!

No Good Very Bad Day portrayal-89189I love the book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst! Recently while surfing the internet, I came across a quote from the book. When I saw it, I just knew I had to use it for my Mother’s Day Meme!  It may seem odd to you but the book about Alexander reminds me of motherhood. On this day when we celebrate our mothers, I am reminded of many who have mothered children but could not have their own. I also think about children from dysfunctional mothers. I think of children who, through no fault of their own, have had to grow up without mothers. Last, but not least, I think of those days as a mother when I thought that early retirement might be a good idea! I am grateful that God created families with both a mother and a father. Both are important and essential. Children do not come with a manual – I know because I have searched high and low for the manuals to my children and nobody, including me, has ever laid eyes on them. So, either they don’t exist or the security surrounding them makes Fort Knox look like a toothpick sculpture. Not all mothers are wonderful and all children come with their challenges. However, in spite of all of that, there is one truth about moms and motherhood that supersedes all others. God has entrusted the mothers of this world with the welfare of His children. No one else can do the job they do. No other person or force has greater influence on a child and the life they will live. Fathers are amazing and their job is no less important. However, a mother’s influence begins at conception and a child innately looks to the mother to determine if they are loved and it is the interactions (or lack of) with the mother that will mostly determine the child’s self-concept and emotional health. Have you ever noticed that the first parent an adopted child seeks to find is the mother? There is no coincidence in that. It is from our mothers that we each, innately, look to to determine our worth and our value. A mother who abandons a child physically or emotionally creates a child who will eventually have to address his abandonment in order to achieve a healthy sense of self. I remember a conversation with a therapist I once had regarding one of my adopted children and the emotional issues that they dealt with because their birth mother had not properly cared for them. She said, “Who knew that when we were changing the diapers of our babies and they were screaming at us for doing so, that we were communicating to them that we loved them and helping them to know that we would keep them safe.” As the mother to both birth children and adopted children, I understand the worth of mothers. Those days and moments when we want to retire early from motherhood are not for us – they are for our children. I know that it can often seem like the payback moments of motherhood have ditched us for someone else. However, every time you celebrate a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day along with Alexander, know that what you are doing is priceless and that, in your own special way, you are making our world a better, happier, healthier and more loving place to be!  I want to give a heartfelt thanks to every woman who has mothered a child and helped them to feel loved and cherished. To all women who have nurtured and loved children, Happy Mother’s Day!

 

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